Source: ISKCON Desire Tree
I stand here,
in front of the blazing fire
that is slowly swallowing up the city I once called home.
The people I once loved
lie dead in front of me,
their bodies still and cold,
while their souls still fight for their honour.
Is this all because of the foolishness of the so called “righteous men” around me
whose egos now engulf their own bodies?
The same men who once sold me to their enemy,
the ones who were supposed to protect me and love me,
but who watched with their hands tied and mouths closed,
as I was dragged off in front of them
and made to lose my honour and dignity.
Or is this the result of the fire burning inside me
that had been suppressed all these years?
The fire to create a mark on this world,
to finally change history;
the fire that has now erupted
from the depths of my heart
and destroyed everything around me.
Or is this the result of all the sins I’ve committed?
The sin of having a razor-sharp tongue,
never knowing when to stop;
the sin of not loving my husbands,
while taunting them for doing the same.
Or is this all just the result of being a woman in a man’s world?
I do not know the answers to these questions.
All I know is that every day I pray to the Almighty
to take me away from this chaos,
to relieve me from the guilt that eats me up from inside,
to relieve me of the pain of being alive in this dark world
where everyone I loved and cared for is now dead,
where there is no hope, no life, no love.
I thought I was the master,
told all my life that I’d change history.
But alas, it turns out that I was just a pawn,
a mere catalyst in this game of life,
where time destroys all.
Himakshi Devi
English Hons.
1st year
[Edited by Debaruna and Mehak Aggarwal
Art Curated by Mehak Aggarwal]
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