“From the first time I saw you, I've belonged to you completely. I still do.”
-Cassandra Claire, City of Glass
The first time I came across this quote, I felt a strange familiarity with it. ‘Strange’ because I had not read the novel before. Now, though, I know why. These beautiful words from a fantasy novel summarize the most romantic novel plots and, consequently, all young lovers’ expectations. A love that happens at first sight and sticks with one forever. As lovely as it sounds, I have come to realize that words are far from reality.
In my teenage years, I too was expecting an eye contact that would bring my rosy fantasy to life. We would fall in love, get into a romantic relationship, have all those endeavors, then there would be a climax and we would’ve been heartbroken - but, in the end, we would bravely overcome all odds to finally get married. A happily ever after.
Except, love is not born from staring contests, at least not for me. The guy I fell for was a friend. Our conversations were fun and everlasting. From random classroom talks between periods, we moved on to chatting online and that turned into phone calls. Short, quick calls transitioned into long talks which subsequently segued into all-night-long conversations.
We started looking forward to our daily chats and we started missing each other when we didn't talk. Every time I pictured him, he became more and more admirable to me. It was then that we took our friendship a little further. It was beautiful; both as an experience, as a feeling as well as a journey. But it was not to be forever.
When we decided to part ways, I felt pain. I wondered if moving on was possible or if love ever just dies. It doesn’t happen so in the books and movies, right?
But I did move on.
I have realized that contrary to what novels portray, falling in love is a process. It is a part of one’s life but not life itself. It is an element in a relationship but it alone cannot sustain the latter. And, most importantly, we don’t fall out of love, we just don’t love in the same way we did before. It changes forms until it becomes constant. This will happen when all the elements between you two will be in perfect proportions to make a nearly flawless match. A forever.
- Anshika Srivastava
B.A. (Hons.) Psychology
(Edited by Guniya and Pallavi
Art curated by Anshika)
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